Where Is UFC Fight Island Located and What Will It Look Like?
Life is all about priorities! And in a world which has been turned upside down and inside out by this global pandemic. What’s most important to fight fans right now is, where is the UFC Fight Island located? Secondly, will the ring girls be even more scantily clad to reflect the surrounding environment?
The truth of the matter is no one apart from the UFC president himself. Along with the company that has been contracted to construct the island infrastructure actually know the island location. And I presume it must be under pain of death that this location is not leaked to the press?
With such a high profile major project taking place somewhere on an island. Requiring personnel and equipment, the materials to build the infrastructure itself and all manner of logistics to coordinate everything. You would imagine or perhaps hope that some lower-tier guy whose jobs it is to mix the concrete. Might throw up an anonymous post somewhere on reddit.com/r/MMA/. I mean are we really asking for too much here?
But until that happens and someone lets Dana’s cat out of the proverbial bag. We can but let out imaginations run wild at what the UFC Fight Island might actually look like. Doesn’t hurt right?
What Will UFC Fight Island Look Like?
As Floyd Money might say “one thing we do know!” It is not going to be somewhere off the coast of cold wet and windy Ireland or the outer Hebrides. As while some of these locations have all the qualities to lure big-budget productions such as Star Wars and Game of Thrones. Cold dank, dark grey skies, coupled with driving rain and the distant rumble of foreboding thunder. Ain’t gonna cut it when it comes to hosting outdoor MMA events.
No, Fight Island will no doubt be somewhere that guarantees good weather. The facilities and somewhat relative ease of access to allow large crowds to get to and from the location. Without requiring Malaria shots or paying off any crooked border guards. Nothing personal Malawi, I have forgotten about it already, not.
But the mystery surrounding the project really is unprecedented. And how the UFC is managing to keep a lid on it is quite astounding. Gets me thinking it’s somewhere where citizens do actually keep their mouths shut. Do as they are told or suffer the consequences. Now, where could that be?
I am not sure if you are old enough or have ever heard of a certain Long John Silver? Probably the most infamous pirate to ever not have lived. Think of Captain Jack Sparrow, but actually ruthless and good at what he did. With Dana White and his hidden Treasure Island somewhere in the far reaches of the sunny climes. A secret location which only he knows about!
As with Long John, we need to keep him alive to find this secretive hidden island. Which for now at least makes him irreplaceable. And what would this paradise for fighters and fans look like? What treasures will it bestow on those who attend and will the ring girls wear bikinis? These are all important questions/fantasies we need to get closure on, damn it!
How Do We Get Fight Island Tickets?
Well, this whole thing is a mystery, so rather than break the mystique. Fans will be asked to partake in a where’s Waldo style, apologies, where’s Dana, style treasure hunt. Similar to how in the past the UFC president would hand out tickets to events for those who followed him on social media. Not making it easy, Dana wants only hardcore fans to work for their seat. No casuals, you guys will be filtered out in the early stages.
Now once you have your ticket, you will be told to be at a certain airport at a certain time and date to make your flight. And all you have to bring is some light clothes, deodorant and your favourite flip flops. Oh, and your face mask!
Then finally the long-awaited call comes in and we are on our way via fight airlines! And what do you know, the traditional air hostesses have been replaced with some of the UFC’s finest, most talented ladies. We are of course talking about the rings girls, who are busy serving cold beers and caviar to those who want, complimentary of course.
It’s a long flight and while we still don’t quite know where we are going, who cares. We can handle another couple hours of this treatment and view at 30,000 feet.
Arriving at Our Destination
We finally made it and as we disembark begin to take in the sights and sounds. With a warm tropical breeze, palm trees and blue skies as far as the eye can see, everyone seems pretty stoked. And would you believe it, waiting on the tarmac to welcome us is a who’s who of iconic former UFC fighters.
Including Randy Couture, Bas Rutten, Mirko Cro Cop, Shane Carwin, BJ Penn, Ronda Rousey, Frank Shamrock, Rich Franklin, Henry Cejudo, Dan Severn, Chuck Liddell, and even a hologram of The Monster, Kevin Randleman, RIP. Who proceeds to break into spontaneous applause as we file our way through. It sure does look like the cultural event that is UFC Fight Island has healed some of those old gaping wounds.
And with no customs to worry about, these private islands do have their perks. As we are whisked off to our hotel by some waiting tuk-tuk drivers. And not from somewhere in Southern Asia, but Brazilians who have been drafted in from the busy streets of Dublin Ireland, where they have managed to congregate in recent years.
Arriving at our hotel, we breeze through the lobby past a large central fountain. And are told; “By the way, that’s not water”, “its chilled draft beer, so please feel free.” And our rooms aren’t shabby either, king-size beds, with a fully stocked bar. And a balcony that overlooks a picturesque scene. Which for all the world looks like it came straight out of the 1980 movie The Blue Lagoon.
But after such a long and taxing journey, we decide to settle in for the night and save our energy for the massive day ahead. Making the most of our huge bed’s whose sheets have all be adorned with UFC branding, real classy.
It’s Fight Day
It’s almost that time, as we make our way downstairs to the hotel reception. Who advise us to simply follow the signs along the path which will lead us through the dense canopy to the newly constructed stadium. And so we set out to make the 10-minute walk through the lush green jungle. With the sights and sounds of the animals that live there all around. Another unusual yet distinct sound pierces through the nature.
It’s that of the UFC President Dana White, who on strategically placed flatscreen monitors which pepper the route as we walk. Detailing for us, what fight island is and what it’s taken to get it to this point.
Quite a buildup as we work our way to our final destination. And armed with the knowledge bestowed upon us and a surging feeling of unbridled excitement. We eventually break through the dense foliage to be greeted by the sight of the arena.
And what a sight it is to behold, as the UFC has not spared in any way on their finest ever creation. A modernly built direct replica of the Colosseum in Rome.
In all it’s glory and how it would have looked back in 80 AD when it was originally constructed. It’s a staggering sight, which has left everyone in attendance with their mouths open, yet speechless.
Adorning its sides are huge screens playing through the massive night of fight card action ahead. And with no time to lose, we giddily skurry our way past the turnstiles and into the stadium’s underbelly.
Making our way to our seats, from somewhere deep below we can hear the fighters. Hitting the pads and getting in the last few pointers as they prepare for the fight ahead. Bringing back all those movie memories of gladiators in ancient Rome, as they prepared to go to battle.
Inside The Fight Island Colleseum
Sweet mother of God! And while not being overly religious, these are the first words ushered. As we stand aghast, looking down and out across the massive stadium which is now quickly filling. Down below sits the UFC octagon, but with a difference.
In a hark back to the original octagon design. While there is no barbed wire, they have decided to add an alligator filled moat. All be it only for show, but it works!
We are welcomed and helped to our seats by some scantily clad attendants, who could for all the world double as UFC ring girls. Informing us that all drinks will be served directly in our seats, so there’s no need to queue or potentially miss any of the action.
And it’s not a moment too soon, as the deep-red sun, sets over the ocean and darkness begins to fall. When a previously unlit section of the stadium is suddenly illuminated. As Dana White appears with Mike Tyson and the now-retired Conor McGregor on either side to take their seats. And signals to let the fights commence!
It’s Become a Reality
As the lights go out, an all too familiar voice to seasoned MMA fans reverberates across the Arena. No way, it’s that of the beloved Pride announcer Lenne Hardt! And as the fighters’ names are announced, the choreographed pyrotechnics explode. We experience a cacophony of sounds and kaleidoscope of colours that light up the nights sky.
As one by one the fighters make their way to the octagon, there isn’t a single person in the arena who isn’t smiling from ear to ear. It appears that like Julius Caesar himself, who established the Great Roman Empire. Dana White has also too crossed the Rubicon. Taking the best of Pride fighting Championships. Moulding it with the best traits of the UFC to create the ultimate of Ultimate Fighting events.
And with fight time almost upon us, one final piece of the puzzle sits snuggly into place. As a blinding spotlight illuminates the octagon, one man stands alone at its centre. Adorned in what looks to be a well fitted gold-thread suit, it’s legendary ring announcer Bruce Buffer. Who with those two prophetic words, commencing the greatest event in combat sports in history!
Images courtesy of danielsecotravels.com, colosseumrometickets.com & rustybrick.com